QuestionHow could I overcome the sympathy for him when I'm separating from him? I'm afraid I will be touched by his sadness and change mind to keep this marriage. If so, I don't really know how to help him with this existing intimacy problem or I don't really want to do it since I have no passions on it at all.
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Hi Beth~
Perhaps you just haven't been compatible with him since the very beginning of the relationship. And even though you've become comfortable with each other, he isn't ready to end the marriage. Since he's used to your company and being together.
If the spark and intimacy have never been there, then that can be a huge problem. Most couples like to feel connected to one another through being intimate with each other. Maybe you love him, but you were never in love with him. And then on top of that, it's the first serious relationship that either of you have had. That causes a bond between a couple (where you can love him, but not be IN love with him).
It's much kinder to him, if you tell him the truth and end the marriage on amicable terms. Than to continue to marriage, when you're basically staying together out of convenience or b/c you feel comfortable around/with one another. Does that make any sense? It's not really fair to either of you to remain together, if you don't share the love a couple should.
AnswerHi Beth~
I'm sure you'll always care for him in some aspect. But it can't be helped that you feel sympathy for him. If you separate and divorce him, it's going to be a rough time for both of you. All you can do is take it one day at a time. Unfortunately, you just don't have feelings for him like you wish you did. If you have no love or passion for him, then you're just living as friends and/or roommates. And it's not fair to you nor him to stay in this relationship, if this is the case. There is no easy way to break the relationship off with him. All you can do is to try to be as supportive as you can.
