QuestionSir,
My quandary begins about four years ago. My high school (and beyond) sweetheart was forced to terminate our relationship by her father. Already, you can probably hear the banjos from "Deliverance" playing, as this tale takes place in a very old-fashioned, backwoods Tennessee hamlet. She was given the option to either date another guy that her dad had basically picked out, or she could get off the farm with nothing but the clothes on her back. Due to the clannish nature of that family, she had no knowledge or resources that would have helped her survive on her own, and I was a college junior at the time with no savings or resources, either. Long story short, she made the best of a bad situation to keep the family happy, even though she was never satisfied. She became friends with her new boyfriend, and did whatever he asked of her, because subservience has been beaten into her all her young life. Finally, a pregnancy scare forced a shotgun wedding. Taking it in stride, she walked the aisle and has made every effort to be a "good wife" AKA indentured housemaid to her husband for three and a half years. There are two small children, a boy and a girl. Over the years, we occasionally talked as friends. Last summer, we spent some time together because her husband was constantly threatening her and she felt like there was a sense of safety with me around from time to time. Now, yesterday, he took away her house key and she left him after he had a cursing, denigrating tirade against her. She has been thinking of leaving and trying to find place to stay for weeks, this was merely the last straw. I have never stopped loving her, and I don't believe that she has ever stopped loving me, either. My question is this: Now that she has separated from him, what are the first legal steps she needs to take toward divorce? And how long must I wait before we can date and get to know one another well again?
AnswerHi Carter~
Since she's separated from him now. She's moving on with her life, and she can date whomever she wishes (even though she's still married); there is no law that says you can't date when going through a divorce or separation. And he can't claim adultery either, b/c you would've been (if you opt to be) with her after they separated.
She needs to file for a divorce through a lawyer to represent her. This is for her protection, so that her husband can't take her for everything she has. She needs to have him served with divorce papers, and proceed from there.
