QuestionI dating my coworker for 5 months, he is 36 italo-americano i am 45 latin lady,we see each other in the job for 15 min, and during the rest of the day maybe we talk no more than 15-20 min all day, when we together sex is good, we have a good time also when we go out, he never has problem people at work know about each other, to me botter and some people make fun,he said he really like me and he want to be with me for long time, but iam afraid more now becouse i have feelings for him i think i going to feel hurt with the time,and i feel insecure plus four weeks ago i start talking again with my ex, who said he loves me really a lot he offer me everything love,financial support, i like him but i left him before becouse sex was no too good and he lie to me about he still living with his ex when he star a relationship with me and i dont know after nine month we were together.i dont know if choose the love with a younger guy o the security offer for my ex who is 11 years older than me,he is also a italo american and he was living with a black women, he told me he love her but she was with her for ten years becouse she help him economically, nobody in his family knows about her. please help me to take a decision. is very important to take a decision as soon as posible i feel like i betrayed both becouse they dont know about the other, and i feel bad.
AnswerHi Elisa~
You left your old BF for a very good reason. He's been dishonest with you and lying to you about him seeing/living with this other woman that he's clearly still involved with. That's why you left him for a reason, and he's your ex-BF for a reason too. Don't go back to him and don't fall for whatever he tells you (a man will tell you what you want to hear to get your in bed, get your money or whatever the case may be), so don't go back to him no matter what. If this other man the one your currently with isn't good for you either, then leave him too. It's all in the type of men you meet and that you're attracted to. You have to change your ways and choices in men. Otherwise you're only going to keep getting hurt and attracting all the wrong men for the rest of your life and you don't need that. I think you know that deep down in your heart of hearts. And just b/c the sex is good with him, that's not a good enough reason to stay with him. You need to be on your own and do for yourself and find happiness on your own. When you stop looking so desperately for a man to give you love and attention, the right one will fall into your lap when you're not looking. You deserve way better than either of these men are currently capable of giving you. You deserve nothing but love, care and respect from a man, and neither one of them are giving you any of these right now. Focus on taking care of yourself and getting yourself and your life in order. You don't need a man to be happy and prosper in life. When you have that frame of mind, that type of man will only bring you heartache and misery. The choice is yours and it's one that only you can make.
