QuestionI was checking our email recently, and was surprised to receive one from another woman addressed to my husband saying "Thank you for the photos of yourself in a bikini, love them loads... here's some of me in a bikini! Send me some more, hot dude!"
I discovered he'd sent more photos of himself wearing a bikini to this woman in the outbox.
I then confronted my husband over this, and he wouldn't discuss it, claiming he can do what he wants.
We've only been married for 6 weeks now and he does... this! It's not normal, and weird/creepy to say the least.
How am I meant to deal with this?
AnswerHI Judith,
Thanks for writing. This is not a great way to start a marriage off, is it? You have my deepest sympathy for what you are going through.
Well, I would say that your marriage is in severe trouble. This kind of behavior is unacceptable and disrespectful, and you must not stand for it. Problem is, he may not be able to stop -- when I hear stories like yours I think that perhaps he is struggling with a sexual addiction and the thrill of the chase. This is difficult to overcome and impossible without professional intervention. Addicts will lie and justify endlessly, and their issue is exceedingly difficult to correct -- more difficult than alcoholism as the addict must learn to have a healthy relationship with sex.
This situation really needs to be assessed by a professional therapist. I would not try to handle this on your own. If your husband doesn't do it, I would consider that grounds to end the marriage.
I wish I had better news. Take care and good luck!
Doctor Becky
