Impact of Parental Marital Patterns on Your Own Marriage | Relationship Advice

Question
Hi Mr. Sharma.

i would like to ask you a question regarding the marriage pattern that runs in a family.I'll be getting married by the end of this year. the guy that i'm marrying are having a lot of family issues. His parents are divorce because his dad married to other woman. During his childhood, his parents has neglected him which it had effect his personality now.He has a very short tempered and he just don't care when someone just walk out from his life because to him,he are used to that kind of treatment. On the other hand, my dad are also married to other woman but my parents are not divorce. so the question is, since both of us having the same history and pattern of problems in our family, will it effect our marriage in future?is there any possibilities that my future husband would become like his dad; married to other woman and leave his family? or maybe he could learn from his past history and would not treat me like how his father used to treat his mom?what do you think?

Answer
Hi Izura,
If someone has been neglected in childhood then some people take learning from past & try to improve on their current relationship. As if some one was poor in childhood he knows the value for money so lot of people study hard & have reached in top positions in companies or businesses. But some choose to stay poor blaming they are from poor family. So it all depends on person if he can learn from past & move ahead & learn to break the pattern.    Same goes for you too, when entering in relationship , enter with open mind & learn to do the best. It will be better if you can meet a counselor in your area for pre-marital counseling. Explore all major issues which all may arise in future so you have solutions in advance.  It's not genetics problem it's behavioral, and behavior can be learned & unlearned very easily. As you said he has temper problem you can also take a anger management class so he can learn to manage emotions & deal with situations effectively.

Veerji
http://www.FamilyMarriageCounselling.com