QuestionQUESTION: hi,let me start from the top,a week before i was married, i was on clomid and got pregnant immediatelly after my weeding,that pregnancy resulted in my first child. ten months after he was born, i used clomid again while still breastfeeding because i was anxious to have another quickly,i did get pregnant,but it resulted in a miscarriage,whereby, they couldn't even find a baby in the sack. a month after, i got pregnant again,with no help,but this also resulted in a miscarriage because they couldn't get the heart beat.all this miscarriages happen before three months,around the 8th and 10th weeks,i really am getting worried and afraid,is something terribly wrong?
ANSWER: Hi Tosin
Your first miscarriage was the same as mine. It's called a 'blighted ovum'. This is when the embryo fails to grow at a very early stage but the sac & placenta continue to grow until your body recognises that there is no baby. Your body then initiates a miscarriage, although in some cases the body retains the empty sac which is not picked up until the 12wk scan, this is called a missed miscarriage.
You fell pregnant quickly after your first miscarriage. The recommendations are that you wait at the very least for one period (aprox 1 month), or ideally 3 cycles (3 months) before trying again. This reduces the chance of a recurrent miscarriage by allowing the body to heal itself and prepare for the next pregnancy.
I am not saying that this would be the cause of your 2nd miscarriage, but it may be a contributing factor.
Miscarriage is a mysterious thing & nobody is really sure why it happens. Research shows that it could possibly be a chromosomal abnormality which develops at the point of conception, meaning the embryo doesn't have what it needs to grow &/or survive. A blighted ovum accounts for around aprox 45% of miscarriages so it's very common.
It's important to look after your body when trying for a baby. If you smoke & drink then do cut it out if you can, particularly if you are taking Clomid. Some prescription & non-prescription drugs can also have an effect, so do talk with your doctor if you are taking any.
The most natural thing for a woman to do after a loss is to want to try again as soon as possible, but it's not always the best thing.
Give your body a couple of months to heal & settle, one loss is a strain as it is so you'll need plenty of time to get back to normal.
There's no guaranteed prevention for miscarriage, but you can reduce the chances by leaving the trying again for around 3 months & taking care of yourself. If you do have another loss, after the 3rd miscarriage you & your partner should have some tests to determine if there are any underlying causes.
I hope this has helped. I wish you the best of luck.
Kindest Regards
Sarah
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: hi sarah,thank you for answering me so promptly,my doctor has placed me on contraceptive pills for a month,saying it should help my body and mind forget the ordeal,but i'm scared it might work longer than it should,also,is a blighted ovum something treatable?i really feel you understand me,thank u once again,tosin
ANSWER: Hi Tosin
You're very welcome.
I think the contraceptive pills are a great idea. This will help regulate your body. As for 'forgetting' your miscarriage, some women are happy with that and some aren't. Depending on how you feel about it will influence what direction you would like to take. I'll never forget mine & think about it regularly, but time has helped me come to terms with it and move on.
Don't be scared about the pill messing up any chances of conceiving again. It's a good temporary measure to get you back on track and as long as you don't smoke, you probably have been put on a low dosage one. This means that once you have stopped it, it will quickly disperse from your body in aprox 4wks. This time will aloow your body to prepare itself for the next pregnancy & help prevent another miscarriage.
A blighted ovum is an outcome rather than a cause & unfortunately there is no way of preventing it. Because it's a result of something that is still being researched, it is not yet treatable. However, please take comfort in that your body works efficiently & that it has miscarried for a reason. I think how painful it would be physically & emotionally for all of us if our child was severely disabled. I genuinely take my hat off to parents who bring up their children with disabilities, particularly if their time in the World is limited.
I hope this has helped. Please do contact me again if you have any other questions or seek some support.
Kindest Regards
Sarah
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: i can't stop thanking u enough for taking time to answer me promptly,i agree the emotional scare is something you can't cure u with drugs,but it's really scary knowing theres really nothing i can do but trust God,i don't smoke, but, getting out of this rot hasn't been easy,in as much as i would love to be pregnant quickly,the scare of this happening again?is really unthinkable,but i guess trusting that it won't happen again is part of the process of healing your body so it really doesn't happen again,please tell me,are there ways that improving my diet could help in any way?and those the fact that i already have a healthy child increase my chances of another full term child?thank you so much sarah,u've been very encouraging and helpful
AnswerHi Tosin,
This is what we are here for, I'm glad I could help :)
Of course you are going to be scared! It's perfectly natural to feel that way, but I think it's important to remain positive. When you fall pregnant again you'll worry. Once you're past 12wks you'll find another thing to worry about....but that's the mind of a lady that has lost. I worried all the way through my pregnancy & I'm sure others thought I was neurotic, but I didn't care. They hadn't known what I had been through & until you've experienced a miscarriage yourself, it's hard to imagine.
Once you've had a healthy pregnancy with no problems then I think it's easy to take it for granted that everything is ok, which is why for women who are already Mums it probably hits harder.
Part of coping with loss is acceptance - of what has happened, why it has happened and the fact that it's possible that it could happen again. Once you fall pregnant again, it makes you look at your pregnancy differently. With myself, I lived each day as it came and really enjoyed my pregnancy. Every day was a bonus & despite suffering from morning sickness from day 1, every time I had my head in the sink I kept thinking 'It's because the baby is healthy'. It's amazing what keeps you going!
How many children you have had in the past does not reflect the ability to have more. It quite literally is the 'miracle of life' & any woman can miscarry at any time. It is of course a plus that you have carried a child full term!
However, following a healthy diet with plenty of fresh food is a bonus to anyone. Theres an excellent source of information here:
http://www.eatwell.gov.uk/agesandstages/pregnancy/
Do take your folic acid if you don't do so already. Cut down (or out completely) alcohol & caffeine. You don't smoke which is great. These changes can be adopted by your husband/partner too as this will increase the quality of his sperm. Zinc is very beneficial for strong healthy sperm, so it may be worth your partner increasing his uptake in the form of a vitamin supplement or through his diet.
I hope this has helped & really wish you the best of luck. My doors are always open if you wish to come back for anything else.
Kindest Regards
Sarah