QuestionSticky situation now...here's the story:
We are both married and our kids play together. One night I went to pick up the kids from friends house and decided to let them play longer and had some drinks with guy and his wife. My husband and I really like them and we've hung out quite a bit. The friend (guy) and I always seem to have a little flirtation going, but not as much when the other spouses are present. Or, at least that's what I thought. I definitely have a crush on him, and from things he says to me when others aren't around, I thought it was mutual. We've both been married for a number of years.
As I was leaving, he walked the kids and I to the door. We always hug and kiss on the cheek good bye, and it seems like he often gives me a longish hug. Nothing unusual this time, except that while we were having our long hug he pursed his lips like a kiss. I gave him a quick peck.
Now, he won't even look at me or talk to me. Our kids have played together, and unlike before when he would always talk and be cool with me, he now looks away. I think he's mad at me. I thought I was just responding to what he initiated, but now I'm wondering if he didn't really do that with his lips, and I was too tipsy and mistook the hug because that's what I really wanted. He's still cool with my husband, and hasn't said anything to him. I don't think he's told his wife, because she seems ok with me. Did I mistake the sign? Did I imagine it? What do I do now?
AnswerHi LostLeo~
He must've figured you crossed the line. And as uncomfortable and awkward as the situation is, you need to address this or the tension can eventually escalate. I think you should sit down with him and talk to him. I would apologize if I misunderstood his actions and if I offended him in any way that that was not my intention at all. Some of it could've been due to a little impairment from the alcohol consumption. The sooner you do this the better too. If you're close enough with his wife, then you might talk to her about it too. I can understand that there's an attraction that both of you might feel for one another and honestly that's not uncommon. It's when lines are crossed that's when the real problems can happen. Perhaps you if nothing else you take away a lesson learned from this and it's not to be physical with them anymore, meaning no kisses or hugs, b/c that might bring back the memories of what happened. I do think it should be talked about and put behind you and not brought up again, if possible. As for your husband, I don't know if I'd mention it to him, especially if he didn't know I had a secret crush on him. This might invoke jealousy from your husband and he might have a hard time trusting you again, and in turn lead to arguments or fights in the future. But if he asks then, yes, you should be honest with him and tell him what happened. I don't think this is an issue that can't be resolved and I see no reason why you can't keep being friends with this couple. I hope this helps you some.
