QuestionI feel as if I were involved in the old Bait and Switch routine. We met and
there was obvious magic. It felt completely different for me, and the feelings
were way different than anything else I had experienced, so we dated for 3
months, but I knew that she was the one, we married 6 months later. We
decided not to have sex before getting married, although we engaged in
other relations. Once married, starting the night of the honeymoon, our sex
life doesn't exist. I understand that some women don't take the initiative, but
when we have sex it's almost like its a "chore" for her. Something she
"doesn't mind" doing. I am heartbroken, as this was only the beginning. I
know and understand that I can not make her happy, only God does that, but
she seems depressed all the time. If the slightest bit of change enters her
life, she just sort of shuts down, be it moving in together post wedding,
moving for a new job, or simple things like friends changing plans. This is
not the woman I thought I was marrying. She was full of life, and enjoyed
living and the great adventure that marriage is. I'd be lying if I didn't say I've
thought about annulment. Any advice? Are these struggles normal for 28/27
year olds?
AnswerSome couples are sexually compatable, some not. When not compatable sex is blamed and held hostage for anything that goes wrong in the marriage, including affairs. So you both need to identify and agree on your sexual appetite levels, and if they aren't in line, decide what to do together without assigning blame, stay together and work on it, or the annulment route.
Bill
