Maintaining Self-Esteem in a Troubled Marriage: Advice for Michelle

Question
My name is michelle, I am 36 yrs. old, been married 15 yrs, total, but we had a 3yr seperation. We have 3 kids. My marriage is full of non- trust. there is no communication, we view life differently. it's nothing but yelling screaming and tension when he is home, he won't leave, and financialy i don't have a choice but to stay. How do i keep my self esteem? how do i except this as my life?

Answer
Dear Michelle,
I know marriage is difficult when their is tension and lack of communication. 15 years is quite a long time and you were pretty young at the time of marriage. Can you give me any other background information? Why is the marriage full of non-trust? How do each of you communicate? Who is yelling and screaming and why? Why did you separate earlier and then why and how did you get back together? What is causing all the stress when you two are together? What do you want for your future(where do you see yourself and what are you doing when the kids leave the house and become independent?) and are you doing anything yet to work toward your future goals?
These questions will help me determine what exactly is the best way to handle your situation and to get what you want out of life.
I look forward to hear back!
All my best,
Kiya