QuestionI waited until marriage to have sex, and have been married to my wonderful husband for 9 years now. Married life has been great for the most part, and even our sex life is good, I have no problem reaching climax, and do pretty much everytime we make love. My problem is that my libido is alot higher than my husbands, he enjoys sex too, but he is happy with 2-3 times a week and I want it every day.
How do I navigate this? I feel unwanted, always being the aggressive one. I would like for him to actually initiate sex also. I don't think it is an issue of attraction, I work out 6 days a week and put alot of effort into "keeping myself up". Any advice would be helpful.
AnswerMarie,
I think I should have married you, my wife is similar to your husband, and I always have to initiate. Our 4-6 times a week has backed off to 2-3 now that you mention it. What I would suggest is to begin to trickle it back to where you want it to be, one extra time a week until you get there. Set dates to get showered up and go to bed early, while you both have some energy left, with the way TV is going this year it shouldn't be hard. There's a million excuses not to do it if you let them interfere, but if you keep at it, you can keep the ball rolling. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday nights, and Saturday and Sunday mornings were our routine. Now it's like Wednesday night and one of the wekend mornings depending on the night before. So I have some work to do too. It takes work, but I think most men can snap back when confronted with the "if you don't use it you'll loose it" axiom. Try to think of different little things to make it interesting, massaging first, changing positions, oral stimulation, sexy clothes, putting chocolate cherries in there, etc. Once you slowly get a few more times added to the game, then I think it will be easier to maintain.
Let me know how you do,
Bill
