QuestionI'm 38 and currently pregnant (only about 5 weeks) after losing a baby last year at about 15 weeks (a little boy - our first). I'm worried & can't seem to get enough info to ease my worries...Most miscarriages seem to involve bleeding and contractions - mine didn't & I just wish I had some answers.
Probably easier to just explain what happened - Last year, a few days before the miscarriage - I started having abdominal pains (lower abdomen) - there was no bleeding or any other symptoms. When the pain didn't subside, we went to the local emergency room where they took some blood, did an ultrasound, etc...and sent me home - baby was fine, I was fine (as far as they could tell) - take some tylenol & rest. Well, the next day was worse - I tried to just relax, use a hotpad - thinking maybe just some muscle pain.
When I couldn't take it any more, back to the local ER. After a full day of blood work, additional ultrasounds, consultation w/ER Doctor, the only other OB available since my two doctors were MIA, etc. - consensus was that the baby was fine, I was not dilating, no urinary/bladder infection, not a problem with my appendix, no bleeding - so they planned to discharge me with some pain killers. Before we signed the papers & walked out, my water broke. They put me in a wheelchair to FINALLY get me out of ER & into the maternity ward (which they said they don't usually do because I was less than 20 weeks along) - as I was getting up out of the wheelchair to walk into the room they prepared for me in the maternity ward - the baby came out. We were devastated. I think we were kind of in denial & didn't really realize what was happening until that moment.
We sent the baby for genetic testing, etc. - we wanted answers. There were no answers to be found. Doctors said there was nothing wrong with me and nothing wrong with the baby - it just happens.
This time we tried for 6 months (took over a year last time)& then talked to a fertility doctor. He has been wonderful & has said that he will recommend that we see a high-risk OB for the pregnancy. Even he said, though, that my symptoms previously were "out of the ordinary" - it didn't seem that I was having contractions since the pain was constant. I do have fibroids but this specialist has also said that based on where they are, they should pose no risk to a pregnancy. We don't see the fetal/maternal specialist until at least a few more weeks (hence, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself) - but I'm so scared & still want answers.
Have you heard of any similar situations - where the baby was fine right up until the water broke, etc. - heartbeat was perfect, no abnormalities, no bleeding, no dilation, no contractions (as far as we know - I was never hooked up to monitor for contractions until the very end) - just a constant abdominal pain/cramp and then loss of our baby boy.
ANY suggestions you have would be greatly appreciated - I just want to do as much research as possible to be as informed as possible this time around. We want a family so much and we don't want to waste any time getting the right answers!
Val
Castile, NY
AnswerVal,
I am sorry for the loss you and your husband had last year. It is hard to have a loss for no apparent reason. In today's world we want what we want, and when that doesn't happen, we want to know why. Sometimes, a lot of times, we don't know why losses happen. It doesn't seem to help to say sometimes these things just happen. It is hard to help you with what happened with your loss. I don't know if you had an incompetent cervix or if it just plain happened. Try to keep in mind that this is a completely different pregnancy. You might very well not have any problems at all. You need to think positive and hope and pray for the best. If it is meant for you and your husband to have children, then you will.
It sounds to me like your body went into labor, since you had so much pain. I know it felt like it was constant pain, but maybe in the begining it was more coming and going pain like cramps or contractions. I am sorry I can't tell you the answers you want to hear, but during early pregnancy, it is a wait and see approach, which is very hard to do. I wish you luck.
