QuestionHi.
I could use some advice.
I've been married 12 years now,
and am starting to question one wedding vow
"for better or for worse".
Frankly, how much should a spouse put-up with
before calling it quits?
Here's the issue:
my wife has a drinking problem.
She's always had it, but I'd always hoped it
would get better. When she isn't drinking, she is
great to be around. When she is drinking, I'd rather be somewhere else.
She makes empty promises to stop, but never does.
I am starting to think divorce.
To make matters more complicated, we have a 5-year-old son.
Is there any hope in this marriage?
Any advice?
Thanks.
AnswerArthur,
Well being quite a drinker myself, I can tell you how much I like it, but I always seem to know when to stop. So what is her interest in drinking, does she like the flavor, or does she drink for a reason, to forget something, releave some stress, bored at home, piss you off, etc.? If you can get to the root of why, you can usually set a goal to cut back some, rather than to quit altogether. The addiction is to have a buzz on, either for fun or for reason. But if you're drinking when you are not supposed to, and can't control yourself, then you need help to stop. You can site the, "shouldn't set a bad example for our son" reason or "if something happens to you, who will mother our son?"
If these types of arguments don't work, then I would think it's time for the pros, AAA, etc. The problem is once the pros get involved, they usually want you to work towards stopping altogether. I've had many friends that had to stop completely, and I always think, why couldn't they have just cut back a little. So think up some good reasons to stop, try to set some goals with her, and try to get to the bottom of the reasoning. If common sense controls don't seem to work, I guess AAA is next.
Bill
