QuestionOkay, so I'm not exactly sure where to start but I'll do my best to explain my question.
I'm 25, going to be married next month. My husband and I plan to start trying to get pregnant shortly after that. I had a miscarriage when I was 16, and it was very traumatic for me I don't remember it well at all. But I do know that I had my uterus scraped (I believe that's called D&C?). I didn't think much of it at the time, but when I told my doctor about possibly starting a family soon, she suggested getting checked to see if I had any scar tissue from the procedure, since it could effect my ability to conceive. It turns out I do not have any, so I feel very lucky.
However, when she was telling me about the possibility of scar tissue and it causing infertility, it really got me thinking. You see, my fiance is 41 years old. Many years ago, he was dating a woman who told him she could not get pregnant because of a condition with her uterus. So they never used protection. For 10 years they had unprotected sex and never got pregnant. Then she had surgery to have scar tissue removed, and suddenly she got pregnant. He was very surprised because she had told him the surgery wouldn't change anything. He still thinks it was just by some freak chance that she got pregnant. I haven't said anything to him about it, but suddenly I'm very upset. How could she have the procedure and not know that it could allow her to get pregnant? Wouldn't the doctors have told her that her infertility was likely caused by the scar tissue? I'm starting to wonder if she got pregnant on purpose, and it's really bothering me. They never had a real serious relationship. She had asked about marriage a few times and he always said no. I can't help thinking that she got pregnant, hoping it would make him stay. After the baby was born, she asked about marriage again and he said no. She went crazy and started threatening him, and doing things so bad that she lost all custody of their daughter. She died of cancer last summer (their daughter is now 7), so I guess there's no way to know for sure if she planned it or not. What's your opinion? Should I say anything about it to him? Is it weird that I'm kind of freaking out about this?
Don't get me wrong, I love his daughter like she's my own. I'm happy to take care of her. But after knowing all the things this woman put him through, wondering about this just makes me feel worse.
I'm writing from Michigan, by the way. And sorry if my question seems confusing. It's a bit confusing to me as well.
Thanks,
Rachel
AnswerHello Rachel from the U.S. (Michigan),
Part of your question is more of a psychological question than an OB/GYN/Infertility question, so I can't answer that part. How you feel about this previous woman, her accusations or actions don't seem to be an issue at this point since it won't affect your life and relationship.
At least you don't have the problem of uterine adhesions/scar tissue which is good. In general, if a woman can't achieve a pregnancy after 1 year, they should undergo an infertility evaluation. One of the tests is to check the uterine cavity which would find scarring. It would then be treated at this time. It sounds like this woman may have had scarring since she was unable to get pregnant until it was surgically corrected.
Good Luck,
Dr. Edward J. Ramirez, M.D., FACOG
Executive Medical Director
The Fertility and Gynecology Center
Monterey Bay IVF Program
www.montereybayivf.com
Monterey, California, U.S.A.
for additional information check out my blog at http://womenshealthandfertility.blogspot.com check me out on twitter with me at @montereybayivf and facebook @montereybayivf
