QuestionHow's it going. I've been in a long and loving relationship going on 3 years now. We're both 22. Up until about 3 months ago, I refused to go on birth control because of the side affects and crazy weird changes to the body. We were very careful about sex, but a few months ago I learned I was pregnant. I had an abortion, and I was asked if I wanted birth control. I decided that it was time, I was sick of never enjoying sex because of a condom.
I'd like to shift off for a second, to address the comment above the text box. You may think low of me because of what I believe, but you have to understand that people are put into positions they can't and won't succeed in. There is no way I was going to have a child at 22, and I cannot afford doc visits, diapers, etc. I have no family to 'back me up' if I get preggers. Also, I think my decision both for the abortion and the birth control were mature decisions that I have no regrets about all things considered.
I do agree with you... birth control pills are awful for the body. I am, other the birth control, a completely pharmacudical free, organic food eating, exercising, healthy person. I wish there was an herbal remedy for birth control.
Anyway, on to my question. Before I began birth control, I could very much know what to expect from my period...3 days long, real heavy then real light. Bam there ya go, every month. I have just completed my first cycle of pills and when I got my period it was quite different. In fact, I suppose it could even qualify as spotting. This kinda creeped me out but I'm thinking maybe my body was just in shock and it will normalize itself. Other than telling me to get off BC ;)...is this normal? Thanks for reading and responding.
AnswerIf you are looking for more enjoyable sex, you won't find it with the pill. Studies have shown that it reduces libido permanently over time. The side effects of the pill include changes in your menstrual cycle, which isn't really a period like when you are not contracepting. It's a false period because your body is being forced to think it's pregnant because of the hormones.
If you are indeed an organic natural person, I would recommend you stop taking the pill before you mess up your body and your health anymore than you have already. NFP (Natural family planning) is just the thing for someone like you. Especially if you are in a "long and loving" relationship.
Abstinence is the only truly healthy and safe remedy for unwanted pregnancy. Unfortunately, no one believes that anymore, except for a few happy people who don't have to worry about their health or pregnancy scares. It used to work very well because sex is an option and a choice and isn't necessary or even good for learning how to love someone or getting to know who they are.
It is before the abortion that the choice should be made because now that you've made the choice, that you've been granted by government decree, you will always have the knowledge in your heart of what you did and how your life might have been different. Abortion can affect your future ability to carry a baby to term. It can make you infertile. It can come back to haunt you later on in life. Your lack of regret now is no guarantee that you will always feel that way.
The support for that little person who was done away with should have come from the child's father, not your family. Are you sure he is as "loving and committed" as you are or as you want him to be? I certainly do not think you are a bad person because of your decision for an abortion. I'm sure you felt justified and righteous and mature about it. But society has failed you because you thought those things and hopefully, you will survive in spite of it.
You can find books and places to teach you NFP in the bookstores or online. You will learn more about yourself and your health and body if you find out what NFP is about. I wish you "success" but when you find yourself regretting the abortion, please get some good help for yourself. Depression is one of the more serious results of abortion, suicide, destructive behaviors, relationship problems, etc.
Best of luck.
