For me, it was “welcome to motherhood”. Ready or not, I was in
for a wonderful experience. But my first challenge was to
overcome the first few months of literally no sleep. It was my
first baby, and I felt the pressure of doing everything “just
right”. I wanted to be a perfect mom. But I quickly learned that
parenting was going to be a lifelong journey and that I would
make plenty of mistakes along the way. After stumbling out of
bed frequently for middle of the night feedings I’d wake up
around 6 a.m. to my newborn crying a joyful solo for yet another
feeding. After about three weeks of this, and then another month
I was completely worn out! Following a cesarean section, I
immediately thought I could be Supermom, Grand Interior
Decorator, and the House Cleaning Company all at once, and of
course I thought I could simultaneously juggle the
responsibilities of a baby that I was so certain would sleep
through most of the day and night. After a few restless nights,
and having noticed that my sweet infant was rarely sleeping at
all, be it night or day, I began to really wonder about her. Was
this going to be the norm? Did infants really stay awake for
hours at a time demanding a feeding every hour and half? Was I
doing something wrong? I couldn’t help but wonder if this
pattern would ever end. I’d read all the many parenting articles
that tell you when your infant should stop waking up so
frequently and begin sleeping peacefully through the night.
Well, I dare say that my little one kept waking up again and
again for nights on end. After a few months I began to think I
was the only mother out there suffering from severe sleep
deprivation! Of course, I knew that I wasn’t REALLY the only
one, but it sure hits home when it happens to you. My young one
is now an active toddler, and things have definitely improved as
far as her sleeping habits go, but I learned quite a few things
during those seemingly never ending nights of sleeplessness and
days of extreme fatigue. If I had to do it all over again, I
definitely wouldn’t have tried to be the Grand Interior Designer
and the House Cleaning Company (and following a c-section at
that)! Here are some handy tips that I should have used and will
keep in mind when I have my next baby:
•Rest, rest, rest! Okay, it sounds trite, and while pregnant
you’ve probably heard everyone in the world tell you to rest,
but once you’ve given birth it’s even more important that you
still adhere to the resting phase the first few days you are
home from the hospital. I can’t even begin to explain how much
rest is needed after a cesarean section…but in either type of
delivery, your body needs time to recuperate, so take it easy.
What does resting mean? It could mean using paper plates so
there are fewer dishes to wash. It could mean having a friend or
relative come sit with you a few hours a day and help you around
the house (which is especially helpful if you have other younger
children). And if you have older children, it could mean having
them help out with more chores around the house. Most of all, it
means to just let some things go. The dusting doesn’t have to be
done right away…perhaps it can wait a few more days, or weeks
even. • People say to sleep while the baby is sleeping. Well,
that didn’t work for me, mostly because I was attempting to get
things done around the house that I couldn’t do efficiently when
my daughter was awake. So here’s what I say: REST while the baby
is sleeping. Sit down, take a break. Schedule that time, and
give yourself at least 30 minutes to do absolutely nothing.
•Thicken baby’s milk. I breastfed my daughter for several
months. In the beginning nurses were telling me that breastfed
babies need to get fed more often because breast milk apparently
“goes right through” their systems. After my daughter was a few
weeks old they gave me the go-ahead on thickening her breast
milk with rice cereal (about a teaspoon full). It did wonders
for her nightly waking ritual. Instead of waking up every hour
and half she slept about two hours longer than usual. I say
that’s good for mom and baby! Of course, check with your
pediatrician first, and again, there are differing views on
thickening baby’s milk, so do (or don’t do) what you feel is
best. •Breastfeeding mothers take a break. For mothers who
nurse, I highly recommend pumping so the baby can be given a
bottle by other members of the family while you rest up.
Breastfeeding is a demanding job and takes quite a bit of energy
reserves. Did you know you burn approximately 500 calories
during one nursing session? That’s equivalent to the amount of
calories I burned on the treadmill a few days ago. So there’s
another reason for you to take a breather. •Take your prenatal
vitamins. Keep taking these. You’ll need them, especially during
this time of recovery. Your body needs all the minerals and
vitamins necessary to boost your immune system and promote
overall health. You’ll be glad you took them daily. •Continue to
eat for two. If you are nursing, this is an especially important
concept, since you’ll need to eat enough to keep your milk
reserves flowing. It’s very easy for postpartum women to want to
begin dieting right after giving birth. However, the healthiest
choice is to simply continue the intake of nutritious foods, and
to eat enough to keep your energy levels up, because you will
definitely need energy in the wee hours of the morning! In
addition, doctors recommend that postpartum, nursing women
intake anywhere from 2000-2400 calories per day. So eat, and eat
healthy. •Keep others in your life. Don’t ever feel alone or
isolated. If you don’t have relatives nearby who can help, seek
for help within your community: churches, civic groups and non
profit organizations, as well as friends. In addition, there are
a host of online communities and discussion groups specifically
geared toward pregnancy and parenting issues that are helpful
for new moms.
Most of all, do the things you like to do most: read, meditate,
write, and work on crafts. Do something you truly enjoy every
day for as much as you can. With time, your baby will start
sleeping through the night, and one day you will realize that
you can finally catch your “z’s”.
Demetria Zinga is the founder and owner of www.faith-media.com,
a technology and consulting firm which specializes in web design
and hosting, graphics and print designs, internet marketing, and
e-training. She is also the founder of www.christianladies.net,
an interactive ezine, blog, and podcast for Christian women.