Choosing Your Birth Care: OB-GYN vs. Midwife & Finding the Right Fit

Question
Dear Ms. Purpur:

I am in my 7th week and have yet to select an ob, nurse midwife, or midwife.  This is my first pregnancy and there are many options to chose from.  My fiance's cousin is a midwife who does home births.  As this is my first, and not knowing what to expect, I don't feel comfortable with that idea, but at the same time, I am apprehensive about chosing an Obstetrician and being subject to their style as well as some of bad hospital experiences I hear about.  I always thought that episiotomies were the way to go from listening to mothers talk about their tearing, but with all of the reading I have been doing, I am learning that if the birth is done right, a woman should not have major tearing during delivery.  Other than an insurance book of providers in my network (I live in New Haven, CT), I have nothing to go on to make my selection.  I am nervous about putting off my selection much longer as I have anxieties about my pregnancy being safe/normal and not being ectopic or in my fallopian tubes or something.  I was wondering if you could make some recommendations or places to get information on my options in my area.

Thank you,
K

Answer
Hello Kristin- how wise of you to be looking into all your options. In many areas, midwives are given hospital privileges and you can use midwifery care and still have a hospital birth with a midwife. I suggest you start with reading three books- Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon; Open Season and The Silent Knife both by Nancy Wainer Cohen. I have purchased all these books from Amazon or you can go to the Bradley childbirth website and Nancy's website. You might enjoy a site called BirthLove as well. To find midwives in your area, go to a site called MANA- Midwives of North America- they should be able to at least get you started in your search. You are correct about episiotomies, they are RARELY needed if you are in the hands of a skilled midwife. By the way, Nancy lives near Boston- you could possible consult her directly. Hope that helps- Cheri.