Having mixed feelings about surrendering your childcare duties to other caretakers is normal. You may worry that you're abandoning your responsibilities, or worse, abandoning your child--but you are not. In fact, using childcare can help you be a great mother. And it's an incredible advantage that was not available to mothers in past generations.
Seek solace in the fact that you are not alone. Childcare is becoming a common element for many families. According to the National Center for Educational Statistics, an estimated 13 million children younger than six spend some, or all, of their day being cared for by someone other than their parents. This includes babies and toddlers.Whether you want to go back to work or need to work so you can support your family, remember this: Working does not make you any less of a mother. Not even close.
In fact, the lesson I learned from childcare--that it is far from an awful thing--runs contrary to the many opinions that I should not have wasted time listening to. Being a devoted and loving mom does not require you to be with your baby all day. Being a devoted and loving mom only requires that you always provide love. Below are two important tactics I used to become comfortable with my children being in childcare:
Realize your child is not miserable without you
I know the scenario playing in your head: You drop off your precious darling at daycare, say goodbye, and head off to work. But then doubt sets in. You imagine that your child is crying, missing you, misbehaving, and breaking down in front of his teachers, or worse--in front of other parents.
But you have to remember: young children are both easily distracted and incredibly resilient. Maybe your child is upset for a few minutes, but oftentimes, starting a new project, reading a favorite story, or playing with a new toy is enough to divert his or her attention and make your child happy again. And good daycare teachers know this. Once you have put in the hard work and found the right place (which we'll discuss in the next chapter), know your child is all right and let it go.
If you still can't shake the idea that your child is miserable while you are at work, try other strategies to help yourself feel more comfortable. Consider asking your child's caregiver to either place a phone call to update you mid-morning, or even take pictures during the day and send them to you by email. The teachers at Megan's daycare would often take these extra steps for me and place an afternoon call coupled with a few photos of her playing dress-up or enjoying circle time. This went a long way toward keeping my own guilt and anxieties in check.
Samantha Knowles is the author of Working Mom Reviews designed to give great tips and strategies to women across the nation. To understand how get the life of your dreams, check out Manifestation Miracle Review To get link'd in working for you, check out LinkedInfluence Review
