Women around the world know what a “bootie call” is, some of us
have been in the predicament and the rest of us only hear the
sad stories of those who have been sucked into world of
bootie-calls only to be heart broken. What most of us don’t hear
about is how to avoid the entire bootie-call situation to begin
with and that’s what you’ll learn to do in this detailed
article…that’s not for the faint of heart!
A dear friend of mine, I wont mention names because she knows
who she is suffered a great deal and it was all thanks to the
bootie-call syndrome.
Yes, there is such a thing as a bootie-call syndrome, it’s a
disease with symptoms and treatments, so it deserves no lesser
of a name.
Allow me to set the scene to explain what happened to my
friend, pay attention because it could happen to you.
After a string of miserably failed relationships basically due
to just bad boyfriends my single friend fell into a state of
depression. She felt that she would never find that perfect
companion, there was no one on this earth intended for her, she
felt worthless, unattractive and after a couple of years living
the single life, she was tired of being alone.
One afternoon my friend and a co-worker went out for lunch at a
restaurant—that’s where it happened!
A man sitting a few tables away stared at her, when she would
catch him looking at her she would look away as not to draw even
more attention to her but the damage was already done. Each time
she looked his way, he was looking at her and the more she would
look him, the more signals he was sending her way by winking or
nodding his head.
Let me point something out quickly, a “normal” single lady (if
there is such a thing) wouldn’t have given this bozo the time of
day but under the circumstances, my friend thought it was cute
behavior.
My friend and her co-worker sat and giggled over lunch,
whispering about this man’s actions until he strolled over to
her table using every corny pick up line in the book. Commenting
on her eyes, her clothing, her smile and how he even liked the
sound of her name.
To make a long story shorter, a few days later my friend phoned
me in tears because she slept with this man. She felt like a
tramp, she was ashamed and hurt by what she allowed herself to
do. My friend had never given into such temptation for someone
that she was simply attracted to, she wasn’t even sure that she
was attracted to him but she only knew that she was carried away
by the attention he gave her.
And that my friends, is exactly the basis of a bootie-call and
it happens to many unsuspecting women every day. If not
monitored closely, it can evolve into the bootie-call syndrome
and be emotionally devastating for a woman.
Luckily my friend realized what she had done and some time
later when this man eventually did call, she gave him a quick
boot!
So what can you do to avoid this trap? It’s simple really but
requires discipline and the steps are outlined below.
Understand that love takes time.
Don’t get carried away with a moment, love does take time and
fifteen minutes isn’t enough. If you’ve been single for a while,
don’t “settle” for whatever comes along. You should know what
you’re looking for, this is called your standard and you should
never lower your standards.
Know that you are worthy.
Just because you’ve had a few failed relationships doesn’t mean
you are not worthy of love. Don’t give up on having a deep,
meaningful and loving relationship even if you’ve been single
for five years or more. You possess qualities that someone will
love, for that someone you’re looking for and that you will one
day find.
Don’t speed up the process.
If you meet someone, you like them, your extremely attracted to
them, everything is going well, you don’t see yourself being
able to settle down with them and you feel the need to
breed—don’t rush. Sometimes even the best of people can get
wrapped up into the bootie-call syndrome without ever meaning
for it to happen. If the feelings are purely attraction then end
the relationship.
Market yourself.
There’s no better way to feel good about being single than
marketing yourself. Get your nails done, get your hair styled,
buy a new outfit and go take some pictures! Join an online
dating service, post a profile, choose some respectful venues to
post ads in search of your soul mate, tell your friends you want
a date, join a singles club, hang out with friends every chance
you get, don’t sit around at home and most importantly, be happy
with yourself. No one can love you, until you love yourself and
dealing with the aspects of being single is the only way to
truly accomplish that kind of happiness.
Mr. Right can’t find you if he doesn’t know where to look.
Putting it all together!
When you know the dos and don’ts, this type of scenario is less
likely to happen to you. My friend had to step back and take a
long look at what happened. Then she made the appropriate
changes, since she has in fact met a man who is madly in love
with her and they are planning to get married next summer. Being
single is hard enough without allowing yourself to make things
harder, avoid a bootie-call if you want more.