Hey there sweet people.
Hurricanes really suck. Even if they do not reach you, they
still
threaten your safety net. Florida survived last years attack of
Mother
Nature, so we are a little more courageous this year. Not much,
but a
little. I would love to meet the person that pissed her off
(Mother
Nature). Not only does she get even, but she does it with a
vengeance.
That’s like PMS & Menopause all rapped up. So, for all you poor
souls
that are in for that ride(PMS & Manopause), and have no clue
what it
is all about, think hurricane. It can turn in a second and
destroy
you. Oh, and it has many names also, like bitch, nag, crazy,
nuts,
annoying, female, insane, messed up, pms’ing, hallucinating, on
drugs,
stupid bitch, mentally challenged, and that’s just a few, except
they
are not in an alphabetical order like the hurricanes. OK so we
are
disorganized. BITE ME! You seriously have to be PMS`ing to be
able to
understand (winks). I can only hope that everyone gets as many
laughs
as I have so far typing this.
OK, now onto more serious matters in life. Today I received a
question from a guy. Here is what he said:
“Posted by Anonymous The last woman I was involved with was
quite full of herself. So then why did she dump me?”
And my answer to him was this… “Posted by Dorothy Hey there,
sorry to hear about your being dumped. Not knowing either
of you, it is really hard to answer that question. There are
many
reasons for people walking away from a relationship. It could
have
plain worn out. Also they could have found someone else. Either
way,
it sucks, and you have to deal with the pain, and learn to get
on with
your life. It is a challenge, but it does make you aware, of
what
being human is all about. There is a saying; “If it doesn`t kill
you.
it will only make you stronger.” Also I am a firm believer in: ”
Things do happen for a reason.” Hang in there, things will get
better, if you let them. Take Care and thank you for sharing
that with
me.”
“Being Dumped” really is one of the worst experiences, short of
death
that we, as humans are faced with in our lives. They say that,
death
of a loved one is easier to learn to live with, than a break-up
,
“Being Dumped” or rejection.
All of the above, tell us that we are unacceptable to someone.
We
immediatley turn it into ourselves and that’s when the
self-blame seed
is sown. Through self-blame we begin to feel shame. Shame is so
painful, that no one talks about it or even wants to think about
it.
Shame is the least identified emotion we as humans deal with,
because
we are ashamed of our shame. Shame, is yet another negative
emotion,
that captures and imprisons us in a pit of hell. It pulls us
into a
life of silence and inactivity, lying and hiding our true fears.
When
we are rejected in any situation, it is a true hit to our
self-esteem.
If we are weak in that area, then our fall is going to be very
hard.
If we are strong in that area, we will quickly become weak. I
wrote
this in a recent blog:
“When we first fall in love; What is that saying, “Love is
Blind”?
Ha! Now that’s funny, because it really is blind. We trust so
instantly and genuinely that we potentially set ourselves up for
the
biggest fall in our lives. Why is that? Is it because we are so
driven
by nature to want to trust someone? Or is trusting someone just
a
happier, easier, way of life.”
So there it is, we as humans, live to love and want to be
loved. We
are blinded by the romance of the word ~ LOVE~. We are made
happy by
the word~LOVE~, but we are also hurt by the word ~LOVE~. So why
do we
continually set ourselves up? We are gambling, and we do not
even
know it. Or, is life simply just that, a gamble? The bottom line
is,
no one wants to get “DUMPED”, because it is not in our nature to
know
how to accept it. How many of you have been, “DUMPED” and just
knew
that your life had ended? You just knew that you will never see
anything the same again. Well, you were partly correct there. It
is
like any other change in our lives. Things will be different
than we
are use to. Your life has definitely not ended. Yes, your
partnership
has ended with a person, and maybe it was not expected, but nor
are
hurricanes or wars. We deal with it all, we have to. We chose to
survive. Think of it as starting a new life. Newness is positive
and
healthy. Look at things differently, and embrace all that
newness. Do
not fear it. “BEING DUMPED”, is just another chapter in your
book of
life. If you had no chapters, think how dull your book would be.
Now,
you can open your self to another chapter, and believe me, there
are
many. If you spend the rest of your life wondering all the
“WHY`S”,
just think, you have wasted even more of your precious time on
something that has chosen another road. As for the fact that a
person
is, full of themselves, that really has nothing to do with the
“Why’s”
of “Being Dumped”. Even the most confident people close doors on
relationships. They in fact, have more courage to do so than a
person
of less confidence, or being less full of themselves, so to
speak. Who
Knows? All we know is that the decision has been made and you as
a
person, with intelligence, must turn the page. Getting stuck in
that
feeling just makes therapists rich. (wink) Life offers many,
many
humps and bumps. We trip and fall, over and over again. The
trick is
to get real good at picking yourself up and dusting off the old
dirt.
This is life. I told my daughter, when she was struck by her
first
cupids arrow, “If you are going to get emotionally involved, be
prepared to get emotionally uninvolved.” It’s life! One very
important
thing we must remember; when we are at the bottom and we feel we
are
worthless and will never ever TRUST again, it’s is a nothing
more than
a human emotion. We know it as doubt. We can over come doubt
very
easily. Look in the mirror, and tell yourself, that you are
UNIQUE,
and you are going to make happiness your goal. You must risk all
the
falls to reach that goal. Letting yourself believe that you are
deserving of another relationship is truly a risk, again another
gamble. But what is life without a little risk? We have the
power to
overcome our negative self. We just need to DO IT!!
“Self doubt is not an option!
Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we often
might
gain
by fearing attempt.”
Shakespear