QuestionHi there! Just wondering if you have any ideas re: coping methods for childbirth. We want to have a baby very badly and I am SO nervous for the whole childbirth process. I feel I am suffering from "fear of the unknown!" We are so excited to start a family and maybe I just need some reassurance on the whole thing that I will survive! Any help would be appreciated, ideas, reading, etc.... thanks!
AnswerM,
You're taking the right step to eliminate your fear of childbirth by educating yourself. The more knowledge you have about childbirth, the less anxiety and stress you will feel.
The first thing I recommend is to ignore the horror stories of other mothers and avoid mainstream television shows on birth, like "A Baby Story". These do not help to educate you or alleviate your fears. Remember, drama sells. Childbirth does not have to be the scary event it is often portrayed to be.
In terms of reading, my highest recommendation goes to "The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth" by Henci Goer. It is priceless in preparing yourself for birth. You will gain a thorough understanding of childbirth, labor and interventions. My next two recommendations include "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" by Ina May Gaskin and "Childbirth without Fear" by Grantly Dick-Read. Another is "Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way" by Susan McCutcheon-Rosegg. It also has some excellent preparation information.
The next step is to make sure you invest in some good quality childbirth education classes, such as the Bradley Method, Hypnobabies, or Hypnobirthing. Avoid all hospital-based classes. While they are typically inexpensive, you get what you pay for. They tend to be a run-down of hospital procedures (most of which you can decline, although they don't tell you this) rather than an attempt to educate you on your true options.
It is also essential to find a care provider whose philosophy of birth matches your own. I highly recommend that you shop around. Even if you'd had the same provider for a while, you need to make sure that your provider is supportive of your wishes. For example, if you wish to avoid an episiotomy (they aren't supported by research), you need to make sure your care provider doesn't give one to every first-time mother. Or if you wish to avoid a c-section, make sure your care provider's c-section rate is below 15%. If it's over 30%, it's very likely you'll end up with one, needed or not.
Another idea is to use a doula, or professional labor support person, to help you through your labor. This is a person specially trained in childbirth support techniques who can help you understand your choices during labor. They do not make medical decisions for you, but will help you understand your options and are well-versed in support measures to keep you as comfortable as possible during the entire birth.
Just remember, women have been giving birth for centuries, before doctors even existed. 93-95% of all births worldwide are complication-free, so the odds are in your favor that everything will go right. The more educated you are, the more comfortable you'll be when the time comes. If you are planning a natural birth or want more information on natural coping measures, visit, http://www.givingbirthnaturally.com
Best,
Catherine
