For our diet and, indeed, in every aspect of our lives, we must
remember to relax from the demands of the unrealistic ideal. For
those trying to lose weight, you cannot be the Barbie. For those
lifting weights, you cannot be the Governor of California.
Accepting this principle first, can give you the peace of mind
to love what you do have, lower frustration, and actually make
weight loss easier in the long run!
A few years ago while driving to the drugstore I watched a
family walk across the street. There was a woman who appeared to
be in her 70′s with a thick mass of black hair flowing down her
back. Next to her was another woman 40ish with a thick mass of
black hair flowing down her back. And walking with them, a teen
with a thick mass of black hair flowing down her back, and
alongside her was a girl about six years old with a thick mass
of black hair flowing down her back. The teen was pushing a
pram. I craned my neck and observed a tiny baby tucked inside –
no there was no flowing mass of black hair. But I could see
little black tufts starting up and I was willing to bet what
that would look like in the future.
I drove on to the drugstore feeling a bit gloomy. When I got to
the store, I saw rows of hair beautification products. Products
to pump up the volume, smooth, curl, add bounce. I had tried
many of them in the past with maybe some improvement but not
much. What I really needed was more hair. If any of those ladies
walking would give me just a little bit of their hair I would
really benefit and I doubt if they would miss it. I have baby
fine blond hair. The kind that wilts in the heat, hangs limply
in the rain and loses its style quickly.
Later that week, I happened to catch the talk show Maury. Women
were on the show complaining about their hair. One young African
American lady caught my attention. About 14 years old, she had
wiry black hair. It sprouted out from her head and went all over
the place. She cried as she told Maury that she had not had a
comb in her hair in years because it got all tangled. I was
shocked as she told Maury that insects landed in her hair and
stayed there. And I thought I had problem hair.
After watching the show, I started thinking about my hair and
instead of viewing it as a problem I decided to focus on the
assets. Ok my hair was very fine … but that meant a couple
minutes with the blow dryer was all it took to dry it. My hair
grew very slowly … but that meant I saved money when I got
highlights because it took them forever to grow out. Also I
would never have to pay for an “UPDO” because there was not
enough hair to do up!
I thought about my struggle to have long hair. My dream hair was
a long, shiny mane. I had given that idea up long ago and
decided to settle for a chin length bob. But that wasn’t working
out either. My hair looked flat and drab. It was the same with
my fingernails. I wanted medium length nails but nail products
and calcium weren’t producing results. Right then and there I
decided to ACCEPT what I had and work with it to make life
SIMPLE and ENJOYABLE. Instead of fighting my genetic code I
would work with it.
Next stop the hairdresser. I had my hair cut off to a very
simple bob that hit just below the ear. On “good hair days” I
could wear it over the ear. And on bad ones or when I got caught
in the rain, I could slick it back behind the ear. Highlights to
give it body and more shine were added and I purchased products
that while they don’t work miracles they were suitable for my
hair. Next I threw out all my nail hardeners. They might work
for other people but they weren’t working for me. I filed my
nails down to a simple, blunt length. I purchased a very good
file and a chamois buffer. If I paint them I will use clear or a
pale pink. But usually they are just buffed to a healthy glow.
No more struggle with the nails. Wow!
It’s amazing how good it feels and how much simpler our lives
become when we accept what we have and work it to our advantage.
Think about what you have, that you struggle to change. Is it
something you can change or is it something that you can’t. Life
is so much easier when you work with what you have. Indeed, no
one is going to mistake me for the Breck Girl or the lady in the
Herbal Essence Shampoo commercial. But that’s ok because I enjoy
my hair and nails now and that’s what matters!