Happiness- you can’t beg for it or buy it or even barter for it.
You can however create it and better yet sustain it. If you want
to be happier long-term make creating and sustaining happiness a
priority and apply the following happiness sustaining
principals.
Choose it The old adage, “people are about as happy as they make
up their minds to be” is true. Choose to live a life of
happiness. When you are not ask yourself why and begin to
irradiate your happiness block.
Be present now At any moment all we have is that moment. Putting
our attention on the past and the future makes it impossible for
us to fully experience this moment right now. One way to remind
yourself to be present is to take a deep breath any time you
notice you are worrying about the future or experiencing regret
about the past. Yesterday is your history, the future is a
mystery. This moment is life’s true present to you.
Make your relationships matter Your deepest, richest, most
profound happiness in life will come from Your relationships:
the people you love, the people your meet who touch you and the
people who’s lives you reach out to touch. The place where we
often make mistakes is we focus on the results we want rather
than the relationships that enrich our life. Put your
relationships first and the results you are pursuing second and
happiness will rarely elude you.
Acknowledge others often Adding acknowledgement to a
relationship recipe always makes it better. When we express our
appreciation to others we are telling them that they matter to
us and we are grateful for their contribution to our lives.
Every one can take in much more acknowledgement than they are
receiving now. Acknowledge someone you love for sharing their
feelings with you, tell your long time friends how much they
mean to you and acknowledge your partner for all the little
things. When you acknowledge others you are also acknowledging
to yourself how good your life is, that sustains your happiness.
Practice approval Part of what makes us unhappy is we do things
we do not want to be doing. Going to a baby shower for someone
your barely know, driving two hours to get there and the whole
time wishing you were somewhere else. If you are doing things
because of a sense of obligation or societal, family, or
community pressure you will be unhappy.
Decide that you are going to approve of whatever you do. If you
do something you have to approve of you doing it. From now on
instead of asking yourself “should I do this?” Ask yourself- “Do
I approve of me doing this?” Whatever you do make sure it is OK
with you.
Communicate your truth harmlessly Fundamental to your happiness
is being truthful about who you are, what you want, how you feel
and every aspect of your life. What is important to recognize is
that we have to develop the ability to say what we want to say
without blaming, shaming or making anybody else wrong. When you
are concerned with being right or placing blame, you are making
someone else wrong and that creates distance rather than
intimacy in your relationships.
Take responsibility for your thoughts and feelings and
communicate in a way that makes other people feel that they to
can speak their truth. This way all your relationships will be
more authentic and therefore fulfilling.
Ask for what you want Do not wait for people to make you sweet
offers, do not fall into the trap of assuming people should know
what you want. Ask for what you want every time you want
something and you will get more of what you want more of the
time.
Release judgement You deserve to live the life you want to live.
That and fulfilling relationships is what brings true happiness.
Allow other people the ability to live the life they choose
without your judgement and criticism. You can only control your
life, putting your attention on how other people ought to live
their lives will cause you nothing but disappointment and
frustration.
Don’t worry about what other people think One way to stop
judging others is to stop thinking about what other people think
of you. Trying to live up to other people’s expectations is
hard, never ending work. This is your life. You are the only one
who has to approve of how you live it.
Happiness is less elusive than you might think. It is also
contagious. One way to be happy is to be with happy people.
Share this information with your happy friends and you can all
support each other in enjoying long-term happiness.