Here are the steps you need to take if you want to make him miss you through text:
Making a man miss you through text is not too hard if he’s already falling in love with you and you have already established a relationship with him.
You just need to have the right plan and a healthy attitude towards texting.
If on the other hand a man isn’t really invested in you and in the relationship, making him miss you through text is going to be harder.
Simply because he has no emotional attachment to you and the “glue” of romantic love is not there.
This doesn’t mean it’s impossible though.
If you follow these 6 steps, then you’ll be a real expert on how to make him miss you through text.
Let’s begin!
What are positive associations?
In the context of relationships, positive associations are a feeling of joy, warmth and positivity towards a particular person.
In the case of texting, positive associations means that a guy truly enjoys texting you and wants to receive texts from you because it adds value to his life.
In contrast, a negative association would be him dreading receiving texts from you, or dreading sending texts to you.
Instead of feeling overjoyed to text you, it feels like an obligation for him.
So the feeling of obligation and dread are feelings you want to avoid him associating with you.
If he has these feelings, you’ve got no chance of making him miss you through text.
Instead, he’ll be repelled and start texting another woman.
So here are a few tips on how to create positive associations through text:
Banter is invaluable to you if you want to make him feel closer to you and more attracted to you.
Why?
Because banter is like a tennis rally. A genuine game that’s fun and exciting.
You hit the ball to him, he hits it back.
Of course if he doesn’t bother hitting the ball back to you, then you have other more serious issues and you should really consider whether he’s right for you at all.
(Toxic men don’t typically like and enjoy banter, because they’re not interested in attuning to you or actually connecting with you. Instead they’re more interested in manipulating you or getting what they can out of you.)
But that’s a conversation for another time.
Banter creates that fun, engaging momentum for you, and the key in good banter is playfulness.
Playfulness is key both through texting and in person if you want a man to fall in love with you and miss you.
But not for the reasons you think.
You don’t want to be playful just because guys like lightheartedness or because guys prefer “happy” women.
You need playfulness because it brings out the best in him so you can have a higher quality texting relationship.
When you have a high quality texting relationship and you have a history of good banter, this creates a deep feeling of closeness.
This feeling of closeness is key if you want him to truly miss you and pine for you through text.
If you’re unfamiliar with banter, my hubby David and I wrote a guide on How To Banter With Men To Build Attraction. Click to read it.
But why does banter create closeness?
Because it allows you to:
So here’s a couple of examples of high value banter and how it can help you create conversation momentum.
Note the conversation momentum created in this example of playful banter:
This next example is from one of our members, and she is in the purple:
If you’d like some free examples of banter you can use to send to a man, CLICK here to take our free class on the “dark feminine” art of high value banter.
If your guy is in love with you already, then most of the work on this step has been done.
If you think he’s falling out of love, then focusing on attraction and connection is the way to remedy that.
If he’s never been in love with you and you were always just casual rather than a committed couple, you need to take this advice to heart.
So how do you build emotional attraction through text?
Banter of course. Here’s an example of what you can text him:
You: “Do you know what I miss about you?”
Him: “What do you miss about me?”
You: “Absolutely nothing! [insert playful emoji here].”
Now:
How do you build emotional connection?
Here are some examples on how to do that:
You can initiate this type of interaction by bringing up something you are bad at, like juggling, or playing football.
Obviously if you’re good at these things, you can find examples of skills you lack or funny moments in which you discovered how bad you were at something.
Here’s something you can say:
“You should’ve seen me trying to juggle last night. I must’ve looked like a one-handed, blind monkey. Do you know how to juggle?”
You don’t want to create some huge drama over text that has you sending a 5,000 word thesis to him (and giving you carpal tunnel in the process).
But what you can do is tell him a quick and simple story from your day, such as:
“I was furious on my walk with my dog today. I threw him the ball to catch as I usually do, and a dog the size of a horse made a beeline for his ball.
My heart started racing as his little life flashed before my eyes.
The horse dog snatched the ball and since my little guy doesn’t know his own size, he chased the horse dog and bit his tail.
The bigger dog retaliated and bit him back.
Luckily his owner stepped in, but the bite left a wound and a bit of blood. I haven’t felt so vulnerable, sad and angry in a while.”
By the way, there’s one thing you can say through text to ANY man that will capture his attention, trigger his curiosity and make him hang onto every word you say. CLICK here to discover this one phrase.
How to make him miss you through text?
One way is to take breaks from texting. But there’s a couple of words of caution that come with this:
In other words, don’t do it because you are scared he’ll lose interest in you, so you want to control him and make him “chase” you.
Because making yourself scarce doesn’t make you valuable to him, and it doesn’t make you a high value woman.
For deeper discussion on this, read my article: Don’t Text Him And He Will Text You: True Or False?
Instead, do it because you want to take a deep breath to focus on yourself or to focus on other important goals you have.
If you smother him with texts because you’re afraid of him losing interest in you, that will just work against you.
So give yourself some space and time away from texting him, and allow him the same.
This absence will give him time to feel what his life is like without you, and it will open up the opportunity for him to miss you.
See this as a way of adding value.
Always communicating with him via text doesn’t make you valuable.
Of course it can be important to communicate constantly at times, and he may even try to text you all the time if he’s head over heels in love.
But sometimes silence is actually what you both need. It can give you both the opportunity to recharge and come back to the relationship with more to give.
Most importantly:
You both need the space to be reminded of the value of the connection you share.
Fact: Some men will string you along for as long as you will tolerate and never fully commit to you. Answer these 8 questions to discover precisely how commitment friendly your man is.
1. When I speak to other guys, and give attention to other men...
He gets jealous and isn't afraid to show it.
I know he gets jealous underneath but he tries to keep it cool
He doesn't have a hint of jealousy!
I don't know.
2. How willing is he to have a fight or argument with me?
He tries hard to avoid fights or arguments
He always wants things his way and won't listen to me
He doesn't show any avoidance to arguments.
I don't know.
3. What is his relationship with his father like?
He has a huge respect and talks fondly of his father.
There's not really a relationship between him and his father.
He talks about his father with disdain.
I don't know.
4. When I first started dating him, he mentioned commitment & long term relationships
Quite often, and he has been happy talking about it.
Occasionally, and he's a bit guarded when talking about it.
Never, he never likes to mention commitment at all.
I'm not sure...
5. How many long term committed relationships has he had?
At least 3 long term relationships...
Just one or two.
He's never had a long term relationship before...
I don't know...
6. How often does he push for sex?
All the time, and he gets pissed off if I don't give him sex.
Rarely ever, he cares about how I feel.
Never, he is a real gentleman
I'm not sure...
7. How keen is he to introduce you to his friends and family
Very keen, he wants everyone to get along with me.
He's not sure, he says he needs to find the right time.
Not keen at all, he tends to avoid the topic and drag it out.
I'm not sure...
8. How much effort has he shown you that he wants to learn about your friends and family?
Not much at all, he never asks me about my friends or family.
On the odd occasion, but he doesn't care about it too deeply.
He is always very fascinated with my friends and family
I don't really know...
We are analysing your quiz results right now and preparing a comprehensive summary. (It's a 15 min read)
In your personalised results email, we will also give you free advice and coaching to help you inspire a deep sense of emotional commitment from the man of your choice, even if you've had no luck with men so far.
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…It flaunts your feminine voice and creates attraction.
A lot of people are a bit shy at the thought of using voice messaging, but you don’t need to be!
Voice messages add that personal touch that helps to create a feeling of closeness between you.
It shows that you’re:
Voice messaging can also add another dimension to your communication, so that you’re not always texting in the same way.
Plus, your feminine voice is an attraction trigger in men.
So you want to flaunt your delicate, soft and feminine voice over text if you can.
By the way, would you like to discover the 17 attraction triggers that are guaranteed to get a man’s blood boiling?
Click here to learn more about our course “The 17 Attraction Triggers”. (The promise of this course is for you to discover the 17 Attraction Triggers that are guaranteed to make almost any man you wish to never look at another woman ever again.)
In the previous step for how to make him miss you through text, we discussed how making yourself scarce doesn’t make you valuable.
Well, the final step is a follow on from that concept.
When texting your man, remember to not play mind games or manipulate him in petty ways. It won’t inspire him to fall in love with you and miss you.
If you need to resort to controlling behavior, mind games and manipulation, then either you have insecure attachment patterns (and need to heal from them), or he’s not actually in love with you.
(By the way, if you want to discover what your core attachment style is, you can do that by taking our specially crafted, women-specific quiz here.)
See: no “tricks” that involve manipulation or have the goal to control his feelings and investment in you will help you in this quest to make him miss you.
He needs to actually fall in love with you. He needs to feel that depth of emotional attraction with you.
That is what will make him miss you.
And in fact, when you can make him fall in love with you, you’ll never really have to try hard to make him miss you, he just will. Naturally.
And it will feel amazing because you’ll feel secure, like you ‘have’ him, his resources and his soul.
So, focus on the right thing: be truly valuable when you text by focusing on the previous 4 steps in this article, and make sure you are a woman of value in his life.
Don’t follow a bunch of strict rules for how long you should wait before you text him back, because you only need rules if you lack the ability to emotionally attune to a man.
I talk more about rules when texting in my article on: Should I Text Him Or Should I Wait? 5 Mistakes To AVOID.
It’s about having the right mindset towards texting, and towards your relationship.
If he has real feelings, that will make him miss you, while short term strategies will not.
If you focus on short-term strategies like trying to making yourself scarce or trying hard to wait a long time before you text him back, this is going to create disconnects.
The most important thing to focus on is creating actual connection and attraction.
That’s emotional connection and emotional attraction.
If you can focus on these things, then you’ll be focused on the correct things.
Fact: Most women do not live day to day in their feminine energy. Are you? Answer the next 9 questions and discover exactly how much you are living in your feminine core...
1. Which of these comments make me feel the most alive?
"How would you like to travel around the world?"
"OMG You’re looking amazing in that outfit."
"I bet you can't figure out fit 2 cheeseburgers in your mouth"
"None of these"
2. In a high pressured situation, my natural instinct is to...
"Eliminate distractions whilst tunnel vision sets in."
"Create comfort by speaking to friends or eating something."
"Avoid the situation or feel depressed about it."
"None of these."
3. In the bedroom, i prefer someone who is...
"Bigger than me physically"
"Smaller than me physically"
"Same size as me physically"
"I have little or no preference"
4. If I’m in a supermarket, and I can’t find something…
"I politely ask the first shop assistant I spot"
"I walk up and down the isles until I find it"
"Don't care, whatever is most convenient"
"None of these."
5. If i had a deadline for a project in a month, I tend to...
"Start now and get most of it done so I don't stress later"
"Pressure is good, I'd rather start closer to the deadline"
"Plan out week by week what I need to do"
"I have no idea..."
6. When I am cooking, I can also carry on a conversation over the phone...
"Very easily, I can probably juggle at the same time."
"It's not easy, but I can manage if I really focus"
"no chance... one thing at a time for me"
"I don't know..."
7. Which of the following describes the kind of intimate partners you’ve had in the past...
"My partners have tended to assume they are right about everything"
"They tell me that they think I always think I’m right about everything"
"Things tend to go smoothly with my past partners"
"I'm not too sure..."
8. It would hurt me more if my intimate partner were to say to me:
"You are looking tired and run down lately"
"You seem to be losing your drive and your direction."
"You really treat men differently than you treat women"
"None of these"
9. In my ultimate dream world, I would rather…
"Trust and follow my own direction"
"Trust and follow my lover’s direction"
"We should both follow our own unique directions"
"I don't actually know..."
We are analysing your quiz results right now and preparing a comprehensive summary. (It's a 15 min read)
This in-depth explanation and analysis will give you all the answers as to how feminine you are and how that affects every relationship you will have.
Please enter your first name and email below so that we can safely deliver your results and explanation to you. (As well as give you $3,765 worth of coaching bonuses!) And yes, we'll treat your email like it was our firstborn.
The best thing for you to do now is to go out and practice the steps I’ve just shared with you.
Specifically, practice:
Most women are so anxious about where their relationship is going and whether a man is committed to them that they lose all playfulness.
And they don’t banter enough…if they banter at all!
Banter is the key, it is what men connect with, it’s what they understand and it’s the best way to meet him where he’s at.
So go out, practice bantering with him and if you need help developing that skill, take our free high value banter class.
(My hubby David runs this class and I highly recommend you listen to it.)
Above all, have fun!
Try not to make dating or texting your man stressful on yourself, and I wish you all the best in your love life.
Now over to you. Do you have any tips for how to make him miss you through text? Any texts to make him miss you? Share below as we can learn from each other.
P.S. CLICK HERE to check out my full article archives! Or you may greatly benefit from one of our highly popular paid programs, CLICK HERE to see what we offer right now.
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Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. She graduated with a bachelor of Law and bachelor of Arts majoring in sociology and psychology. She has been a dating and relationship coach for women in the past 15 years and together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 20 million women through their articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
Connect deeper with her work through the social media links below.